This is who I AM, really.

Dear Reader,

I don’t know what kind of a day you’re having, but since you’ve landed here,  I want to thank you for stopping by.  I know that your time is valuable, and I hope not to waste it.  I don’t imagine that reading what I have to say will alter your day a whole lot, unless you happen to be a slow reader.

Life and Other Turbulence seemed like a good summation of what I have to share as a writer.  As I look back to the road behind me, I can tell you that I’ve navigated much of my adult life by using my finely honed sense of humor and acutely focused gut radar.  And, I rely on the shoulders of my inner circle when the going gets rough.

I operate more by instinct…and I’m not one to ponder much.  That’s just how I roll.   The turbulence in my life has been manageable, and I know this because I’m here writing about it.   Like a bumpy flight high above the Sierras in a stormy weather pattern, it’s caused my nerves to fray, but it’s always leveled out for a relatively smooth landing just the same.  Maybe not on the runway of choice, but wheels down and wings in tact.  Priorities are crucial.

I’ve often thought of writing a book which I would title ‘My Life As A Corporate Wife’, detailing the many crazy circumstances and cross-country re-locations I’ve endured over the years out of sheer ‘stand by my man’ loyalty.  This would be followed by a weighty book titled ‘The Dumbest Things Movers Do’.

But rather than focus on that, I’ve been working on another writing project.  It’s emotionally slow going.   Which brings me to the purpose for this blog.  Let’s face it.  I have stage fright.  So, I’m thinking that if I manage to garner a virtual audience who actually has an ongoing interest in my blog, it will surely bolster me forward to keep on sharing.  I’m told blogging regularly is like swimming laps… the more you do, the easier it becomes.

“So,” you might ask, “what’s your source of inspiration as a writer?”  Well,  I’m probably old enough to be your mother (um…but if that’s REALLY true, just think of me as an aunt.)  I have enough mileage behind me now to fill volumes, but thankfully I’m also young enough to have the interest to get my tales captured forever.  My family may well appreciate this some day when I’m really old and too cranky to give a hoot.

But, getting the words down as a blogger may prove a challenge, which is where YOU come in.  I like the idea of writing to my computer screen, but only if I know it’s not for naught.  I don’t need much of a following…just enough to know someone has an interest.  I’d be curious if the tables were turned.  So here’s a snapshot of where I’m coming from:

I am the daughter of parents who loved me unequivocally, though much of their attention was directed towards my older  siblings for very important reasons.  One was critically ill.  The other was critically out of control.

I grew up as a shy youngster.  My father was a professional gunman (explanation coming in a later post) and the Superman of my universe.  My mother was Lois Lane, but with a cane.  I matured into a young adult with hard formed opinions about a lot of things.  Life was not dull in my childhood.

I’ve been married (to the same guy) for a LOT of years…and long enough to know he’s not perfect, but it isn’t for lack of effort.  He’s closing in with each new year.  Although I’ve often felt like our marriage was akin to Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride,  I recognize that marriage is truly about compromise.   It’s not about me.  It’s not about him.  It’s about how we can navigate the road together and still come out whole.

I’m a Mom.  Yes, that’s with a capital M.  No matter how tall they grow or how many candles are on their birthday cake, I still love them with all my heart, even if it means backing away to give them their own adult breathing space.  I’m also a mother-in-law (yes, that’s with a lower case m) to two delightful women.  They both already have Mothers…they don’t need my relationship in that way. And I love them both enough to understand this.  And, I’m proud to call each of them my Daughter-in-law.  Yes, that’s a capital D. (You’re with me on this now, right?)

So, while my boys are settled into their adult lives, I’m cheering on my youngest baby as she looks to her own future, discovering her own path as she sails (literally) the often choppy waters of the future, while working hard for a large organization of scientists in their efforts to educate the general public about the health of our ever evolving planet.

I’m also now a grandmother (gasp!) and an organizer and a detail girl.   I have multiple longtime clients.  Some are non-profit organizations and others are private individuals whose home offices are under my careful watch.  There’s nothing better to keep you grounded than working in someone else’s orb for awhile.  I can tell you:  Money does not buy happiness, but it does allow you someone like me, who can pay your bills and manage the busy (and often hilarious) details of your life that come with high net-worth.

I’m a reader, a dabbling artist,  a committed volunteer, and a longtime dog owner.   In what I like to refer to as my ‘past’ life, I used to be a not-so-hot skier, a wild-card golfer, an okay equestrian, a totally challenged horse owner, and a principled corporate employee.  I miss the horses, I miss the skiing, I miss the golf.  I do not miss the corporate crap that was rather appalling to my ignorant expectations of high standards.

I’ve volunteered in classrooms, hospitals, barns and museums.   And I can tell you a fair amount about sea lions, elephant seals, harbor seals and the well being of their ocean home, thanks to my five years as an education docent at The Marine Mammal Center. More recently I have been volunteering as an Adoption Counselor for a local area German Shepherd Rescue organization.

Lastly, and probably least importantly in terms of self-identity, I’m a cancer patient living with stage 4 advanced disease.  There is no cure on my horizon; only ongoing medical treatments that will keep me alive for as long as I still have quality of life.  Once that’s gone, I’ll be folding my cards.   I can tell you about  surgeries, more surgeries and losing body parts.  I can tell you about chest ports, chemos that didn’t work, targeted gene-specific therapy infusions, and radiation.  I can tell you about the ongoing hunt for remission and what it’s like to be scanned every four months as my oncologist doggedly pursues any sign of furthered progression of disease. And I can tell you about the curses of internet research on my own diagnosis.

I’m not interested in the statistics of cancer survival.  I’m following the advice of my original oncologist. I’m living in the HERE and NOW.   I facilitate bi-monthly group calls with other patients from around the  nation who are struggling emotionally with the same grim outlook on their own prognosis with the same disease.  And on a weekly basis, I cover one three hour shift answering a national telephone hotline specifically for those in dire need to talk with someone who understands.  These support services are offered by SHARE, a cancer support organization based in NYC.

So, that’s it in a nutshell.  When I began this blog back in 2012, it was to get into the habit of writing routinely, because I was working on a memoir project.  I needed to find my true voice.  Pretty sure that mission has been accomplished.

I felt my first post should be my intro.

(FYI:  The above is my first blog post titled ‘Jumpin’ in with both feet..’    Wanted you to know, in case you’d planned on clicking there next.  Instead, go warm your coffee and click on the next item down, ‘About being a writer..’  It’ll explain how this whole thing started in the first place)

24 thoughts on “This is who I AM, really.

  1. I’m in a similar boat with why I started my blog. Trying to build confidence in what your writing and figuring it out if it is any good is a challenge becaue it’s always tough to please yourself. Here is my blog http://blogbybenk.blogspot.com/ if you have the time to take a look. I always appreciate good feedback. Good luck, keep writing, and I look forward to reading more posts.

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    • Life and Other Turbulence

      Ben, thanks for stopping by my blog, and for the support too. It’s kinda like diving off the high board for the first time…still wondering how deep the pool really is. I actually wrote about the whole anxiety of it all and why I got started to begin with: https://lifeandotherturbulence.com/about/

      But, no matter the anxiety and strive to please yourself first, I think we’re both on the right track by writing as often as we can. It’s about the journey in the end anyhow. I’m headed to your blog next…

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  2. I’m checking in to see who you are from a comment you made on my blog and I like what I see. I can relate to a lot of what you’re doing, even though I grew up on the other side of the world–Africa. Hope to see you again soon.

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    • Life and Other Turbulence

      Thanks for stopping by, Rossandra. I’m really looking forward to reading more on your site too (I signed up to be a follower). The blogging journey has really been a nice surprise for me, as I’m finding some lovely comments and kindred spirits out there in cyberspace! Hope we continue to stay in touch…

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  3. Beautiful post, beautiful style – writing and photos. I found your blog while perusing the internet for writers who also use personal experience in writing for professional clients. This may be a slightly different focus than yours, but your writing is simply engaging.

    I recently started blogging again. The balance between personal story and professional content is not easy. I’d welcome your thoughts – and comments, if you were so inclined – especially since some of your other posts suggest we might have different perspectives. http://www.alynconsulting.com/diversity-blog/.

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    • Life and Other Turbulence

      Hi Jody,
      Oh my goodness…thank you so much for your very kind remarks! I so rarely receive comments, and I truly cherish the feedback. Writing is something I’ve always enjoyed, but blogging has been an adventure with uncertainty…and one I’ve had to pursue with a rather false sense of bravery. My real focus has been to persevere on a much larger personal writing project, and I figured blogging might help me to keep on pushing towards the ultimate end goal.

      I look forward to reading your blog…I took a quick peek just to be sure you weren’t a spammer in disguise (yikes…there’s so many of those and I have NO idea how they find me.) From what I saw, I can tell you that I will certainly settle in and read your blog with great interest. Thank you for reaching out!

      Sending all good wishes!

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  4. I had to stop by and just say hello fellow WordPress blogger and that I have been reading some of your posts and am really enjoying your writing. I love finding blogs that are written by those who love to write and share their stories. I look forward to following along.

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  5. Ann kearney

    You sound lovely and a forward thinking positive person. Surviving life’s challenges and continuing to discover yourself in the process is a wonderful thing. I have 3 grown children, was the care giver to both my parents who suffered heart failure for years (both have passed several years ago), been married 30 years this month, and have been a project coordinator at several large companies. I’ve been taking care of everyone else for so long that I’m at a “seeking” point in my life. I’m just 50 but am now finding with my parents gone and kids grown, I almost don’t know what to do with the extra time I have. I’ve always loved to write and am thinking of blogging and looking to leave a ten yr job at a photography studio to experience a new beginning. Thanks for putting your “life” on “paper”, you’re inspiring.

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    • Life and Other Turbulence

      Dear Ann,
      I haven’t been at this blogging business very long, and receive so few comments that I often have to remind myself that I don’t write for feedback or commentary. Blogging allows me to express the thoughts that are most prominent on my mind on any given day, and of course to share any essays or book snippets that I feel brave enough to put ‘out there’. I never did keep a diary growing up, and blogging is a good way to simply record your thoughts as life continues to unfold. It sounds like you will have plenty to write about as well, so I say: Go for it!
      Your kind remarks have truly made my day, and I so appreciate your taking the time to let me know what you think. Sending all good wishes to you as you venture forward with this next chapter in your life! (and, let me know when your blog is up and running…I’ll stop by!)

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  6. I can see reading about you here that we have so much in common and that we started our blogs with the same aim in mind. It is risky, scary, but here we are! I would like to support you in your writing and I am going to sign up to follow you. Thank you so much for visiting my blog and for your lovely, kind comments and for the follow. I’m so glad because now I’ve met you and I’m really looking forward to reading so much more 🙂

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    • Life and Other Turbulence

      Thank you, Sherri! How nice it is to meet another kindred spirit…I loved your blog and also look forward to seeing more!

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  7. Good morning, I have nominated you for the One Lovely Blog Award, it’s yours if you wish for the taking and no rules! Here is the link: http://sherrimatthewsblog.com/2013/11/13/first-frost-melts-in-the-heat-of-dragons-loyalty-award/
    Congratulations and have a lovely day :-

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    • Life and Other Turbulence

      Sherri, oh my goodness… thank you so much! I will display it proudly on my site (as soon as I figure out how to do that 🙂 Thanks for brightening up my day. xoxo

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      • You are very welcome!

        The best way I know how is to insert the URL of the logo into an image widget. Hope that helps 🙂

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  8. Hi, I read your new stuff regularly. Your writing style
    is witty, keep doing what you’re doing!

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  9. HI Anne,
    I read your first blog and loved it. I know you better, now. 🙂
    This is going to be great, and I’m honored to be a part of your journey.

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  10. I love your blog title and reading about you and your journey.

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    • Life and Other Turbulence

      Thank you so much Terri. I very much appreciate your taking the time to reach out. My seat belt is fully buckled for this current ride, one that couldn’t have been more unexpected. Happy to see you’re a blogger too! Will stop by and visit..

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  11. Hi, this is my first visit to your blog and I’m hooked. I love your writing, your style and your story. If I could compare your writing to cooking you would be a master chef, three star Michelin. Could you please throw a little of your ability my way.

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    • Life and Other Turbulence

      Gerlinde, thank you so much for your very kind words and for taking the time to not only visit my blog, but to comment as well! I tried to click on your website but there’s an error message that said SERVER NOT FOUND. I love to cook and would love to visit your site. Sending you all good wishes and heartfelt appreciation for your support!

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